I'll know I'm getting old
When my bits start heading south
And I start getting far too fussy
About the food I put in my mouth
When I look seriously at the adverts
In 'Glamour' and 'Cosmopolitan'
At the miracles that can be performed
Using botox and liposuction
But for now I'll keep eating chocolate
(And yes, I may get bigger)
Because life is too short to be dieting
For want of a better figure
©cih00